Okay...so this fall, when I was talking to my counselor and was feeling much better and handled this all so much better, she mentioned the 5 stages of grief. I never really considered them fully until now. So. Let's review.
1-Denial. this happened before her death. I denied that she was only given a certain amount of time.
2-Anger. happened about an hour after the non-stop crying stopped. It involved screaming at random people and getting angry over everything about her.
3-Bargaining. Also happened before. Bargaining with the Powers that be, aka. God. about why this has happened to her and all other children, esp little children in general.
4-Depression. That definatly happened. You, reader, know that.
5. Acceptance. Part of me has, part of me hasn't. Someday (soon) it will happen. It needs too. Its only a matter of time. I know that the logical part of me haas accpeted it, but the irrational, stubborn side hasn't.
So that's the thought for the night. Opinions are welcome this time.