It always seems like...

that as soon as things get going good again the magnetic fields of the earth switch up and it all goes bad again.

And its not so bad yet...but its definatly a lot worse than last week.

I swear it is a cycle...lets take 2008 as an example: January was the best month of the year..nothing could make it worse. The in Feb. my grandfather dies a week before my seventeenth birthday. March was great.

Then at the end of March I get the news that on of my best friends was terminal with cancer - given six months to live. April and May were a blur with finals, AP tests, Kelli, and graduation. June was great and horrible. I spent the begining of the month back home in Greece, then the rest in NY with Kelli. July was the worst month of my life...when Kelli died. At least shes' not in anymore pain and she's in a better place. I spent the next two months (July and August) moaping and not accepting her death.

Now in September, as I have gotten help and accepted that she's in a better place and that it is so much better for her to be there than here on this planet suffering. I have gotten okay. I am not spending my free time moaping and crying, but for the first time in a long time I am happy.

So that would mean that this cycle has to fuck up my world again and indeed it has. My grandmother is not well. I am not that close to her...living on the other side of the world does that to you. But I hope she will get better...my mom is there now.

I gues in a way life is like a cycle. There are cycles in everything. I guess what it comes down to is the fact that once it all is great something has to go horribly wrong.

ahh...anyway...at least I know its gonna get better.